Episode 5

Vic and William Porter - Sober, Alcohol Free Stories and leaving despair behind

Published on: 18th October, 2024

Today I talk to William Porter, author of Alcohol Explained 1&2. William shares his personal story, the dark days and nights filled with loneliness and despair that he could no longer accept.

William explains how drinking nearly lost him everything, and how understanding the scientific impact alcohol has on human beings in detail has supported him to ten years of sobriety, becoming healthy in mind and body, and a successful author of 5 books.

Listen with me and celebrate the sober superstar that is William Porter.

Transcript
Speaker:

Hi, everybody.

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I'm.

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I'm Victoria and I don't drink.

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Welcome to Sabre alcohol free stories.

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Today, I'm going to

talk to William Porter.

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We're going to talk.

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About the realities of drinking and how

his darkest moments where the catalyst.

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Two is 10 years of stable living

and becoming successful author.

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Five books, including

alcohol explained one and T

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hi, William.

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A very warm welcome for me tonight.

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. I've been really looking

forward to this today.

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I'm really appreciative that you've

come onto my podcast because obviously.

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You're very well known in sobriety,

because you've written books

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that have completely transformed.

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People's.

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People's died.

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So a big thank you for that.

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And I'm very variable.

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Welcome.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: I know

that all the people that I communicate

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with, on your Facebook group, and I have a

sober group, a WhatsApp group with ladies

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who I met on Sober Easters, they all

talk about your book and you hear people

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quoting bits of it to help other people.

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So really inspiring,

brilliant to have you with me.

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And I can't tell you how delighted

I was when you said you'd come on.

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I didn't actually think

I was reading it right.

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So thank you.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: no.

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Thank you for inviting me.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

And I need to show you a picture.

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So this is for my Soberistas

ladies, because we met you at The

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Sober Easter's 10th birthday party.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yes, I

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

a picture.

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I don't know if you can see it.

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There you

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Go.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: I can.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: So

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: shirt.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

that's it.

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And we've all got our little name tags on.

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So that was me and Jane and I, and

my, my friend Sally took the photo.

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So I said to them, I'll , show you

the picture of us all together when

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I get you, get you on my podcast.

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So,

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

to them all.

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Yeah.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: I will.

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So yeah, so the podcast is

about people's stories.

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And really what I'm interested in

is where you were when you started

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thinking about the fact that alcohol

wasn't really working for you anymore.

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And perhaps some of the whys around

that and just what led you to make.

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The decisions you've made, how

you did it, all of those things.

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So really there's a lot of you talking

and probably not a lot of me talking,

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which makes my job nice and easy.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

But that's what I want to do

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because there could be somebody who's

feeling the way you were feeling.

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And that's the person that

I want this to talk to today.

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Really over to you, so if you could tell

us a little bit about who was William

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Porter before the alcohol was stopped

and what took you to that decision,

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

It was, so obviously, so I stopped

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drinking in February 10 years ago now.

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and to put it into context, I'm 48 now.

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So I was 38

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: right?

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

I stopped drinking.

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And I started when I was 14

and I was always a bit tipsy.

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binge drinker.

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Went on holiday or I had an

extended period away from

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work, I would drink every day.

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But I found it was incredibly difficult

to do my job when I was drinking

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I don't know if you know this,

but I'm a solicitor by trade.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: So

it's brain work and turning up hung over.

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I just couldn't do the job.

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So I never really got into

the habit of drinking daily.

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but I was also in the reserve

battalion, the parachute regiment.

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So At one point I was mobilized

and sent out to a tour of Iraq.

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So that was six months.

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I was out of work for virtually

a year because you do two months

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build up training and then you

have two months decompression leave

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Of that extended period I was

drinking like all day every day.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Right.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: So

it was really heavy drinking and I think

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where I got to in 2013, early 2014 was

I would drink Until I fell unconscious

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and then I would wake up in the night

and drink more to get back to sleep

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Up again in the morning.

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So when I say I was a binge

drinker, literally the weekend would

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come and I would drink non stop.

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I had two young children, so they would

have been about say, months and two years

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or so, there's about 18 months between

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yep.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

So it was incredibly, Difficult

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with young children anyway.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: So hard.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

it is, yeah, really hard.

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And we were living in quite a small house.

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Didn't seem to have enough money.

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I didn't particularly like my job.

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So it was all getting a bit on top of me.

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And obviously when you're

conditioned to drink,

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When you're stressed or unhappy, if

you're stressed or unhappy all the

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time, you tend to just drink and drink.

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But I think what really prompted me Was

almost the despair and loneliness, when

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you wake up at three or four in the

morning and you're just completely alone

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and your thoughts are just ramped up

and just feeling dreadful and wondering

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what on earth you're doing to yourself

and that was just getting too much.

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And I think when I stopped in February

14, can't even remember properly the

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sequence of events, but I think there'd

been a business lunch on the Tuesday or

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Wednesday, so I'd had a few drinks then,

home and carried on drinking, and then

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I don't really have much memory of it.

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in sick, just stayed at home

drinking all day every day.

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And that lasted about five days.

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And so when I came to my wife and kids had

gone, she'd gone to stay with her mums.

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and obviously, so I literally didn't

have a clue what was going on.

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I was in a complete mess.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Gosh.

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I didn't know any of that.

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I I've obviously you've, I read,

I've read your book, I've listened

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to lots of things, podcasting,

I didn't realize any of that.

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It's such a horrible experience

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

yeah it's such, it's almost like that

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anxiety and despair that you feel when

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Up and it's just horrible.

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Yeah, cause it's interesting

cause the book's not really

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autobiographical, it's not

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: No.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: So

I don't often, quite often on podcasts

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I'm talking about the contents of the

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

my own story or else it's a very

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quick sort of fill in bit at the

beginning just to introduce myself.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

But no, there were some

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really dark times then.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

On some level, if you're someone

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that should probably not be

drinking you have that regularly.

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And I know that I had anxiety.

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Which I hadn't actually

attributed to drinking at all.

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I didn't think it was

anything to do with it.

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But when I stopped drinking, it

went away and it was very strange.

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Yeah.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: yeah.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

You don't, because it happens

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in reverse, doesn't it?

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You get the anxiety when

you wake up having not drunk

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yes.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

of drinks and it goes away.

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And I think that's where it becomes

so because when you feel that level of

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just despair and anxiety and depression,

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

get rid of it and to feel

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normal again for a few minutes.

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And that's where you get into that

cycle of almost constant drinking,

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wake up at four in the afternoon, four

in the morning, whenever it was just

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absolutely riddled with depression

and anxiety and just having to have a

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drink just to get rid of that feeling

for a short space of time, regardless

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of what the consequences were.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

So you came around and everyone

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was gone and what did you do?

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What happened?

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

So I, I was crawling out of it.

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So interestingly enough, this was like

a Saturday afternoon or so, and I'd

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sobered, I'd almost got to the point

where I physically couldn't drink anymore.

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I was just throwing it all up.

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So we're

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Up a bit.

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and I think I went round to see

my wife at her mother in law's,

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but I was in an absolute state

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: No.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

That night and I think that was

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one of the worst nights of my life,

because obviously when you're in that.

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stay.

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Your brain's wired up.

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You're massively anxious.

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I went to bed that night and

literally just lay there for the

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entire night, waiting for the

night to end, it was horrible.

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but really my mindset at that point

was I just, I can't keep doing this.

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I can't keep putting myself through this.

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It's just not.

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Something I can keep doing

it's going to kill me.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

You probably would have,

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wouldn't that, in the end, if

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

Yeah, I think so.

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It's because I look at

myself now compared to it.

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So this is 10 years as well.

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And when I look at how I was in my late

30s compared to now in my late 40s.

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I was in quite a bad way.

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My hair was gray.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Really?

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

It yeah, it was quite heavily gray.

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It's more gray than, there's a little bit

of gray in it now, but it was quite gray.

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And I had like sores all over

my mouth and on my tongue.

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And that's just what you

can see on the outside.

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What's going on in the

inside, God knows what.

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And if you think of adding maybe 10 years

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

Of doing that.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

level of drinking on top of it.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

I, Most certainly have, if I was

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still going, I'd probably have some

pretty serious health consequences

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by this point, I would think.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: It

is systematic poisoning, isn't it?

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So I suppose,

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: it is.

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Yeah, and of course, such a basic point,

but when you sleep your body regenerates

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itself and alcohol stops you sleeping,

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: yeah,

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

Alcohol induced

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unconsciousness is not sleep.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: no,

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

just falling unconscious.

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You're not actually sleeping.

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So your body's not repairing itself,

which is one of the reasons why alcohol

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is linked with so many different types

of cancer your body's just not got that

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ability to repair and recuperate itself.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: yeah.

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That's something that I'm really

interested in and don't know an

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awful lot about, but I have heard

you talk about that before, this

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carcinogenic side of alcohol, because.

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I was someone who smoked.

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So

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

I smoked for years.

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It started at probably 16 or something

and just on and off throughout the years.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

drank, so probably for the same

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time frame, smoking, drinking.

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And and I worried constantly about getting

cancer from smoking, literally constantly.

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It never stopped.

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Ever crossed my mind that drinking

wine regularly w could do that.

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I just didn't know, and I find it

really shocking that I didn't know.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

It's interesting, isn't it?

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So the World Health Organization, it's

medical branch, I forget the name of it,

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but it classifies substances according to

how carcinogenic they are to human beings.

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And alcohol is in class one along with

cigarette smoking, radiation and asbestos.

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But what's fascinating, what I find

really interesting, it was classed

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as a class one carcinogen in 1985.

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So it's not a recent thing,

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: no, I

was only 10 then they could have told me.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

Yeah, I know yeah, I was born in 76,

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was, yeah but it's amazing because

people just don't, and I didn't for years

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either, like you, I associated smoking

with cancer, but just not drinking.

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It just seems to be the

information's there.

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But I suppose because there's been so

many, campaigns about smoking and health,

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but there just hasn't been anything

similar with drinking and health.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: no.

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And I wonder if there ever will be,

I did a charity walk a few years

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ago, but at the end they were

offering glasses of Prosecco and I

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had at this point stopped drinking.

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And I was on my high horse about that

because I thought hold on a minute.

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Like you're a, charity that's

supposed to be supporting

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health in one way or another.

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And there you are offering these

prosecco's at the end of this walk.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: get

my head around it, but I felt like

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a bit of a Karen, moaning about it.

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It makes you feel like you're

being like a bit, I don't know, of

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a miserable old cow about it, but

it's really dangerous, isn't it?

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: It's

a, it's an interesting one, isn't it?

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Because on the one hand you feel

like you need to say something,

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but on the other hand, is pointless

if people are just going to think,

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Oh God, what's she going on about

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Anyway.

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So it's a, yeah, it's right.

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It's just a bit of a fine line about when

to speak up and when not to speak up,

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

yeah, absolutely.

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Even with your friends.

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I think talking about this particular

subject with friends would just

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probably annoy them because nobody

wants to know that, do they?

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Nobody really wants to know that.

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Yeah.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: So I

forget what the percentage is, but it's

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80 90 percent of the population drink.

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And they're not interested

in hearing the negatives.

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They want to keep doing

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

decided they like it and they need it

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to enjoy social occasions or whatever.

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And they really don't want to

hear the negative side of it.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: No.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

on Facebook once.

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And you know these ridiculous, just.

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Yeah.

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Memes where it's oh, a glass of

red wine is good for you, and

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

this thing popped up, and it had

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been, I don't know, like 10, 000

likes, and 5, 000 shares or something.

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And I went back to the page

that actually published it.

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And the previous post was about

someone who'd quit drinking and

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was enjoying life, not drinking.

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And it had 40 likes and two shares.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Oh, yeah.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

that's the problem.

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The information's out there, but we

live in an age where the more people.

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Something and share it

the more people see it

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: when

you've got something in the region of

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90 percent of the population Drinking

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having a vested interest in

portraying the fun benign side of

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alcohol That's what's being forced

into people's feeds all the time

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

and also you find what you want

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to find as well, don't you?

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When you search.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: yeah.

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Yeah.

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It's like when you've got a

pain or something wrong with

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you, you can virtually have

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

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Anything.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

can't you, by googling it?

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Yeah.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

I know that.

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I certainly would have looked for

the, it's okay to be drinking.

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

Yeah, absolutely.

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Yeah,

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Sometimes I do get accused of

being a bit judgmental of drinkers.

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But for me, successfully stopping

drinking, you have to shift your

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perspective about Alcohol and drinking

and it's inevitable that you're going

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to see drinkers in a slightly different

light Because if I was still looking at

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drinkers and envying them and thinking all

that looks really nice I'd be struggling

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whereas now when I look at drinkers I

think about They're going to be waking

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up at 3 4 in the morning unable to get

back to sleep and they're going to wake

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up tired And a bit washed out even if

they're just having one or two it's It,

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there is a kind of, I think there is a

crossover between judging people, but

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shifting your own perspective for your

own protection, if that makes sense.

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: it is.

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And that's really important.

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I actually, I was speaking

to someone else about this,

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about the cognitive dissonance.

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Isn't that, is that what it's called?

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Where you,

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william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

Yeah, two

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vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

it has to be the truth to you

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that you don't want to drink.

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And to do that, you have to have all

the knowledge that you can to make sure

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that you can see it for what it is.

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And that playing the tape forward

for me is one of my main tools.

345

:

If ever I get a little bit of that

envy, it's the main thing for me

346

:

to go, no, because my reality in

that situation is not the glamorous

347

:

thing that I'm imagining right now.

348

:

Yeah.

349

:

Yeah.

350

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

was something I didn't even

351

:

realize I was using it as a tool.

352

:

But when I stopped drinking and I'd look

at, , someone having a beer or something,

353

:

I think, Oh, that looks so good.

354

:

And I'd think to myself Just think

of the reality is that in the, three,

355

:

four hours, you're going to be waking

up in the middle of the night in

356

:

that very dark place again, really

tired, but unable to sleep and your

357

:

anxiety levels up and all the rest of

358

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

And you're not going to

359

:

have one beer, are you?

360

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

No, realistically, no, anyway,

361

:

but I almost reconditioned myself.

362

:

So whenever I look at alcohol now, it

almost repulses me at the thought of

363

:

having to go through all that again.

364

:

So I've almost Like I say, almost

like Pavlov's Bell or whatever

365

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

366

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

Reconditioned myself with it.

367

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

368

:

It's wise.

369

:

You have to, you've got to find a

way if you want to stop doing it.

370

:

And that's a really good way.

371

:

It's what I've done as well.

372

:

And I've re reinvented my whole image,

which was very much the party girl.

373

:

That was my thing.

374

:

And now I don't drink is

my tagline on everything.

375

:

And I'm proud of it.

376

:

I am actually proud of it.

377

:

And it's not the easiest thing to do in

this world where Everybody hangs a hat

378

:

on drinking and, can be quite judgmental

about people who don't drink actually

379

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah,

380

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: so

381

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: but I

382

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: that was,

383

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: a

larger and larger number of people who,

384

:

when you say you don't drink, they sidle

up to you halfway through the evening and

385

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: oh yeah,

386

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

it out a bit.

387

:

So I think there's more and more people

getting interested because when I

388

:

wrote Alcohol Explained, it was eight

or nine years ago, I suppose now.

389

:

And the attitude was very

much, am I alcoholic?

390

:

If the answer is yes, then

I have to quit forever.

391

:

If the answer is no, then I

just need to be a bit more

392

:

sensible and drink a bit less.

393

:

But nowadays it's completely different.

394

:

People are just saying, forget

how much I'm drinking or

395

:

whether I'm dependent on it.

396

:

Is it worth it?

397

:

Am I getting more out than I'm putting in?

398

:

And that's a very different

way of looking at it, I think.

399

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah, I

really liked from your book something,

400

:

I can't remember how you, worded it, but

in my head, I pictured it like a jigsaw.

401

:

So you were talking about when,, when

people say were you an alcoholic?

402

:

That's the question people

love to ask, isn't it?

403

:

It's easier just to say yes, like

even if you don't think you were,

404

:

because that just shuts everyone up.

405

:

But anyway, for the answer to

that question, I'd always thought

406

:

of it as this kind of scale.

407

:

And I was on the scale somewhere, but

what I listened to in your book was

408

:

around, let's say that your life is this

jigsaw, because this is how I picture

409

:

it, and there's all the different

things that you do in your life.

410

:

How many of those things Can you

only do if you're having a drink

411

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: drink

412

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

and then what does that do?

413

:

So that made me think of, the

Christmas or birthdays or going out

414

:

for dinner or some people getting

up in the morning or whatever the

415

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: Mhm.

416

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: picture

is, and I picture it as, color each of

417

:

those things in red, and how much is red?

418

:

And then that's how much of an

alcoholic you are, I don't know.

419

:

And if you said that to people

who consider themselves to be

420

:

normal drinkers, I wonder how much

of their picture would be red.

421

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

It's an interesting one, isn't it?

422

:

Because I quite often say this, but

if I say to a room of people, up who

423

:

thinks a night out with friends is

more fun if you've had a few drinks?

424

:

Everyone sticks their hands

425

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yes.

426

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

But if you say to the same room of

427

:

people, up who is psychologically if

not physically dependent on a drug to

428

:

such an extent you can no longer enjoy

life or cope with life without it?

429

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

430

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

puts their hand up.

431

:

But it's the same question.

432

:

It's exactly the same.

433

:

If you need it to enjoy

a night out with friends

434

:

As enjoyable without it, you're

relying on that substance.

435

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

436

:

It's a connection that people

just don't make, isn't it?

437

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

So normalized.

438

:

It just doesn't dawn on people and

it's, it's fascinating when you think

439

:

of it as well and like people at work.

440

:

Oh, I've got a day off tomorrow.

441

:

What are you doing?

442

:

Oh, nothing, but I'm going

out on a big night tonight.

443

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

444

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

It's so normalised, but stop and

445

:

think about that for a minute.

446

:

You need a drug that's going to wipe you

out for the next day, make you so ill

447

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

448

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

to have a day off work, but you

449

:

have to have it in order to enjoy

450

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

451

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: out.

452

:

It's,

453

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: I

would plan my weekends and I would

454

:

think I can't do that on that day

because I'm out the night before.

455

:

So I knew that was going to happen.

456

:

I knew that I was going to feel

rubbish, but I still did it.

457

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

Yeah, still did it.

458

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

It's very weird, isn't it?

459

:

It's such a weird thing that we all do.

460

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

Yeah it's interesting when you

461

:

get that different perspective and

you start looking at it slightly

462

:

differently, because for me,

it's, I know I keep talking about

463

:

perspective, but I do genuinely

think we've got the correct view of

464

:

it's not just a clever way of looking

at it to make you not want to drink,

465

:

because when you actually strip it

away quite coldly and scientifically.

466

:

It's a worrying trend that people can

no longer enjoy a night out with their

467

:

friends fully unless they're drinking.

468

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

Yeah, it really is.

469

:

It's actually quite sad, isn't it?

470

:

There was a lady, it might have been

on your Facebook group just this week

471

:

and someone had said that they were

struggling because they weren't gonna

472

:

be able to enjoy those kind of cozy

autumn evenings And just the association

473

:

that for that, for them and many people

that involves a glass of wine when

474

:

actually there's so much more about

those lovely evenings that you can enjoy.

475

:

And I love going to things

like the fireworks, or I love

476

:

Christmas sober, actually, I've

now had two sober Christmases.

477

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

isn't it?

478

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

Really nice.

479

:

I used to feel awful on Christmas

day because I had this rule in

480

:

my head that it was Christmas.

481

:

So you started in the morning,

then you try and make a dinner

482

:

that never worked very well.

483

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: No.

484

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

it's so lovely.

485

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

mid afternoon.

486

:

Yeah.

487

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

488

:

Having had an argument.

489

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

Oh God.

490

:

Yeah.

491

:

Dear me.

492

:

Yeah.

493

:

It's always that idea of it.

494

:

It's always the idea, not

the reality, isn't it?

495

:

That drinking that you think so nice.

496

:

You think about, oh yeah, that glass

of champagne on Christmas morning.

497

:

Forget about the entire rest of the day,

feeling awful and tired and just washed

498

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

Yeah crappy.

499

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah

500

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

so you stopped drinking,

501

:

obviously, and you've written two

books, if not, is it three now?

502

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

So I've got two alcohol, two

503

:

nicotine, and a diet, so it's five

504

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

it's five now.

505

:

Good grief.

506

:

Okay.

507

:

So obviously it's it's been a

benefit to you, stopping drinking.

508

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

509

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

You've gone on and become

510

:

a very successful author.

511

:

Did you, what was your biggest challenge

with it when you were trying to stop?

512

:

What was the thing you found hardest?

513

:

Yes.

514

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

awful, and although I knew it would pass,

515

:

even 20 minutes feeling like that is an

awfully long time, it was stringing those

516

:

first few days together, and actually

it wasn't so much of a challenge, But

517

:

my mindset when I stopped was, can't

keep going through these cycles, I just

518

:

can't keep doing it, I have to stop.

519

:

now I'm never going to enjoy

Christmas again, or going on holiday

520

:

again, or seeing friends again.

521

:

There's this massive part of my life

that I used to enjoy because I was

522

:

allowed to drink when I was doing it.

523

:

That I will no longer enjoy.

524

:

And that was my mindset.

525

:

So I just didn't want to go out

and didn't want to do anything.

526

:

But of course there's some occasions

where you have to go for whatever reason.

527

:

So I thought, Oh yeah I'll just

turn up and literally stand there

528

:

and wait for the evening to end.

529

:

And that was, I think, the biggest

thing, just that adjustment.

530

:

But actually, it turned out, of

course, that's not the case at all.

531

:

You go out and no matter how miserable

or awkward you feel, eventually

532

:

you'll start talking to someone and

lose yourself in the conversation.

533

:

And suddenly 40 minutes has gone by and

you're actually quite enjoying yourself.

534

:

And it's that kind of eye opener.

535

:

And then you think I suppose that

makes sense because occasionally, you

536

:

go out in the morning for coffee with

someone and enjoy chatting to them.

537

:

So you don't need alcohol.

538

:

And of course when you're a

child you socialise, you go out

539

:

to parties and have a whale of a

time and you don't need to drink.

540

:

It's only when you start doing it that you

lose the ability to enjoy yourself without

541

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

yeah, it's funny.

542

:

I, yeah, completely relate to that

because I used to, even when I

543

:

was a drinker, I loved going for a

coffee or a lunch with a friend, it

544

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

545

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

like a relief to do that because I

546

:

think I was always worried about the

consequences of the actual night out,

547

:

despite the fact that I wanted to do it.

548

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

as well, wasn't it?

549

:

Because if you're meeting

someone at three or four, you

550

:

know you're on it for the entire

551

:

It's not like you can say I'll go

and meet you for a couple of hours,

552

:

have a few drinks and then I'll

go and do something afterwards.

553

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: True.

554

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

committed for the night

555

:

right up to unconsciousness,

556

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

557

:

And then the hideous day the next

day as well, you've committed to.

558

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

559

:

Absolutely.

560

:

God.

561

:

Yeah,

562

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

more of those for us.

563

:

That's a good thing.

564

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

Oh God.

565

:

Yeah.

566

:

Thank God.

567

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Look,

our time is really zooming by and I

568

:

haven't asked you much about your book.

569

:

I do want to ask a little bit about

a couple of things because they

570

:

were light bulb moments for me.

571

:

So if anyone hasn't read it, it's

Alcohol Explained one and two.

572

:

Both brilliant.

573

:

Very clear on what's going on when

you're thinking, I'll just have

574

:

one and then don't, or I'm going

to take away the anxiety and end

575

:

up with more, all of those things.

576

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: yeah.

577

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: drink

a pint of water before I go to bed

578

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: Okay.

579

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

because that will fix everything.

580

:

And weirdly it didn't.

581

:

So

582

:

Wondered if you could just share

a little bit about why that is.

583

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

584

:

So it's one of those things

where you when you think about

585

:

it, it makes perfect sense.

586

:

, so alcohol is a diuretic, which

means it makes you go to the toilet.

587

:

So everybody has a sort of a supply

of water in them and you use it for,

588

:

obviously when you breathe out moisture.

589

:

And if you get hot, you need to sweat.

590

:

So you've got like this

water supply on you.

591

:

But it's not constant because if it's

freezing cold, you're less likely to

592

:

need water internal water, for example,

for sweating, is why when it suddenly

593

:

gets cold, you might find you need to

go to the toilet because you're okay,

594

:

but then it gets cold and your body

says I'm not going to need to sweat so

595

:

we can get rid of jettison some water.

596

:

So I imagine it like a petrol

gauge in a car showing you.

597

:

where the tank is, how full it is.

598

:

When you drink alcohol, it

basically, it messes with that gauge.

599

:

So your body thinks it's got

a lot more water than it has.

600

:

So it starts jettisoning it all.

601

:

So if you drink alcohol and you're in

that dehydrated stage, it doesn't matter

602

:

how much water you drink because your

body thinks it's got too much anyway.

603

:

So it's just getting rid of it.

604

:

So the only way you can rehydrate when

you've been drinking is to wait for

605

:

the effect of the alcohol to wear off.

606

:

And then drink and actually you cause

yourself massive additional issues

607

:

because when you're drinking, you're

washing salt through your system.

608

:

So if you're having like a pint and

then another pint of water before

609

:

you go to bed, all you're doing

is washing additional salt through

610

:

you, which does a number of things.

611

:

It makes you feel dizzy and nauseous.

612

:

So it's adding to the actual hangover,

also it causes salt cravings, which

613

:

is why we often wake up hungry,

because we want salty food, like

614

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yes.

615

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

so foods that are high in

616

:

salt are like kebabs, pizzas,

cheese, crisps, all that kind of

617

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

618

:

All of those, all of the above guilty.

619

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

620

:

So it doesn't do you any good

trying to rehydrate until that

621

:

chemical effect has worn off.

622

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

623

:

I just found that fascinating.

624

:

It made me laugh because I'm

not joking for 20 odd years.

625

:

I'll have a pint of water before bed.

626

:

Everything will be fine.

627

:

It wasn't.

628

:

So we've spoken about that.

629

:

What was your thing?

630

:

Oh, I heard you mention on

something the other day, club soda,

631

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: Okay,

632

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

is something is that something to

633

:

do with yourself or is it something

that friends of yours have set up?

634

:

I've never been, and I'm really

interested to know a little

635

:

bit more about that as well.

636

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: So

Club Soda is set up by Laura Willoughby,

637

:

and an organization that sort of, it

promotes and encourages low and no

638

:

alcohol drinks and their availability,

there's now an alcohol free off license

639

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Okay.

640

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

Covent Garden, Drury Lane,

641

:

so it's a really nice place.

642

:

It's quite a small, Literally alcohol

free off license, but there's a couple

643

:

of tables in there, two or three or four

tables And they've got a couple of things

644

:

on tap and they serve drinks as well

645

:

so it's really nice to just pop in

and have a yeah Pop in there and

646

:

grab an alcohol free cocktail or

an alcohol free beer or something.

647

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Nice.

648

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

It's yeah, it's really nice

649

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: I

thought I'd ask you about it because

650

:

I'd heard you speaking about it

and I thought, I can Google it, but

651

:

I'm going to be speaking to you.

652

:

So I'm going to ask you instead.

653

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

no, if you're in London and near there,

654

:

it's definitely worth popping into.

655

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547: Yeah.

656

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

nice space to, to go and just

657

:

sample some alcohol free drinks.

658

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

there we go.

659

:

That can be the nice, warm, cozy

Christmas feeling for me this year.

660

:

Go and have a night

661

:

At club soda.

662

:

Sounds good.

663

:

I think that was all I was going

to talk to you about today.

664

:

I'm honestly so grateful that you've

come on and spoken to me and I'm

665

:

glad to have heard your story.

666

:

And for anyone who hasn't the Alcohol

Explained books are brilliant.

667

:

And there's also a Facebook page, which I

think everyone is extremely supportive on.

668

:

So I'd encourage people to get on there.

669

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

actually, isn't it?

670

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

It's really nice.

671

:

So thank you for all of that because

you definitely helped me, a massive

672

:

part of me being where I am today.

673

:

And I'm a lot more successful today

than I was when I started this

674

:

journey in all aspects of my life

and my happiness, most of all.

675

:

So thank you for that.

676

:

It's

677

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547: done.

678

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

helped me.

679

:

william-porter_1_10-16-2024_193547:

No, thank you for inviting me.

680

:

vic-host174_1_10-16-2024_193547:

No problem.

681

:

Thanks, William.

682

:

Bye.

683

:

squadcaster-bg06_9_09-21-2024_084137:

Thank you for listening to our

684

:

Sober Alcohol Free Stories.

685

:

If you felt that it helped you, make

sure that you like, share and follow.

686

:

And leave a review on podchaser.

687

:

com.

688

:

And remember, make your

catchphrase, I don't drink

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About the Podcast

Sober, Alcohol Free Stories
"I Don't Drink"
If you’ve ever googled “do I drink too much” this podcast is for you!

This is for those of you who end up wondering what’s wrong with you, questioning how your friends can possibly drink so slowly, or worse can just have one with dinner (aliens). For those of you who have tried to moderate, just a Thursday, only red wine, not before 6, not after 9, not if I’m wearing blue 😊

For those of you who secretly don’t enjoy the theatre because you know the show will be an interruption to a booze filled evening. For those who fall out with loved ones, lose handbags, feel lonely or shameful the morning after, wear sunglasses on the school run, or enjoy way too many mints for an average human. For those who need something to change but feel it it’s impossible to break up with their loyal companion – booze.

The good news is you are NOT weird, or alone, there’s millions of us, just like you. You CAN stop drinking alcohol. I know this because until Jan 2022 I was all the above, and now “I don’t drink”.

In this podcast we will delve in to what it takes to become alcohol free in a society that’s quite frankly obsessed with drinking! I’ll talk to people just like you and me, some near the beginning of their alcohol-free life, and some further along, but all with one thing in common, the courage to stare booze in the face and say NO, NOT ME, NOT ANYMORE! They will share their sliding doors moments, regrets, loves, pink clouds and the tools that have helped them to succeed.

We will show you that life without the “wine witch” is actually pretty amazing, how we all thought we were losing something, but what we have gained is insurmountable. We will share how our lives transformed, skin began to glow, sleep became deep and relaxing, bodies became healthy, relationships flourished, careers progressed, and our minds were at peace. WE will show you that you deserve the chance to be happy and free and turn what may seem impossible into possible.

Listen along and join me in making your catchphrase “I don’t drink”.

About your host

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VICTORIA Banat