Episode 7

Vic and Sharon, Sober, Alcohol free stories and getting a new sat nav!

Published on: 18th July, 2025

 Hi everybody and welcome to Sober, Alcohol Free Stories. I'm Victoria and I don't drink. Today I'll talk to Sharon, whose severe drinking sent her in and out of rehab for years and experiencing many failed moderation attempts. Sharon finally found what worked for her in spirituality and transformed her life into the tranquil world where she now lives. Happily reaching out to support others and help them along the way utilising scientific techniques including belief coding.

Transcript
Speaker:

Hi everybody and welcome to

SRE Alcohol Free Stories.

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I'm Victoria and I don't drink.

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Today.

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I'll talk to Sharon, whose severe

drinking sent her in and outta

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rehab for years and saw her with

many failed moderation attempts.

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Sharon finally found what worked

for her in spirituality and

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transformed her life into the

tranquil world where she now lives.

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Happily reaching out to support

others and help them along the way.

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, vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

Hi Sharon.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Hi,

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: you?

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

how are you doing?

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

I'm good, thank you.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Good.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: day.

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Feeling happy today.

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thank you for joining me.

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Looking forward to hearing

all about your story.

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So we'll just dive

straight in if that's okay.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

Yeah, absolutely.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

ask you if you can share your

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story with us please, Sharon.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: I can do

that and it's an absolute pleasure.

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It's great to be here, Vic.

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Thanks for inviting me.

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my name's Sharon and I don't drink 'cause

it says on your lovely little pink poster.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yes.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: I don't

really do labels, but, my drinking

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was very severe, but I'll rewind back,

right back to the beginning for you.

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I started drinking when I was a teenager.

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13, so early teens and, right from day

one, really, I knew there was something

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a little bit different about my drinking.

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Everyone around me would have enough

after a couple of drinks, being

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young girls, having enough after a

couple of drinks, an I was always the

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one going, can't we get some more?

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Is there any more?

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even from that very early age,

something happened to me when I drank.

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and I knew this anyway because

I could see this kind of

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problem drinking in my family.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

and at the back of my mind I

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knew it was gonna be a problem.

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But when you're 13 you just

think, you know, let's go for it.

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We're having fun.

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There's absolutely

nothing wrong with this.

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I was doing what everybody else was

doing, and it was real good fun.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: and that

carried on, obviously, into my late

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teens and started going out clubbing.

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And this was in the late

eighties in my case.

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you know, and I had some fantastic times.

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Not everything about drinking for

me was bad from the offset, but

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I did know that there was this

problem and I did wonder when it was

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gonna catch up with me, you know?

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

it's funny that there can be a

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little voice there, isn't it?

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That you knew so early on.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

Yeah, definitely.

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It was definitely there and I think,

'cause I saw problem drinking in

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one of my parents, , I thought maybe

I'm gonna be like that as well.

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But just brushed it aside.

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It wasn't really until.

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my late twenties that I really started

thinking and other people started

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making comments about my drinking.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Right.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: you're

drinking a bit too often, you're

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drinking too much, comments like,

why can't you just have one drink?

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and I'd to be asking

myself the same thing.

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To be honest,

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: you know,

I'd go out fully intending just to

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have a few drinks and, , get lost

and not get back till the following

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day and stuff like that, you know?

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so my intentions were there.

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But as I said to you, , it

was as if something happened

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to me when I had a drink.

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It just completely lit me up.

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It gave me everything I needed.

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It gave me confidence to dance,

to talk to people, to socialize.

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It gave me everything I needed.

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But what also happened to me

as well is I seemed to get

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this craving for more and more.

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More.

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so by the time I was in my late

twenties, people were starting to

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comment and I was starting to worry a

little bit, but even then I thought,

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no, I can get this under control.

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So all this sort of trying to,

control my drinking started, you know,

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I'm only gonna drink it weekends.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: You know,

I'd been married and, I had a little

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girl and I didn't drink all the way

through my pregnancy and breastfeeding.

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I didn't drink, but as soon

as I could go back to drinking

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again, I was like, can't wait to,

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yes.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

know, go out for my birthday and,

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really gonna go for it, you know?

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'cause sometimes I would go out

and know I wanted to go for it.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: By the time

I was in my late twenties, that wasn't

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the kind of thing I wanted to do anymore.

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I didn't wanna get thrown out at

nightclubs for dancing on the tables

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and squaring up to the bouncers and.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: There's a

certain age you can get away with that.

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And when you're sort of late twenties,

early thirties, it's not cool

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anymore to be behaving like that.

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So it was around that time really when

I started thinking I need to get a bit

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of control on this, otherwise I'm gonna

end up like, the person who I saw in my

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family I, started then sort of saying to

myself, I'm only gonna drink it weekends

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and I'm not gonna drink in the house.

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'cause I've started doing that as well.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: drinking

during the week, just a glass of

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wine when you get the little one

down, you know, and then it would

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turn into two glasses of wine.

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Then I'd be struggling because I wanted

some more, but I couldn't really get any.

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And, you know, it was becoming a problem.

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When I started trying to

control it, I realized.

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That I couldn't.

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That's it in a nutshell.

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I realized that by the time I

decided right, I need to get control

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of this, I'd already crossed some

invisible line where I'd lost control.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: and

so from my early thirties, I'm 54

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now and I got sober 11 years ago,

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From my early thirties to my

early forties, there was a

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whole decade of getting sober.

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And then going back again, getting

sober and then relapsing again.

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for me, part of my story was having to

go into treatment for medical detoxes.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: I spent

tens of thousands of pounds on going

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into rehab and I was sort of in and

out, in and out, and I couldn't just

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seem to find the right solution for me.

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There's lots out there.

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and you know, certainly now, like

I'm an advocate for all different

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kinds of recovery programs, whether

be Smart Recovery, recovery, Dharma,

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the 12 Step program, I've dipped in

and out of all of these programs.

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and they've all got something really,

really good in them, when I finally hit a

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rock bottom in my early forties, and I've

been in treatment several times, I started

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becoming interested in, spirituality,

through some of the programs that I'd

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been working with, to try and get well,

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: that was

where things started to change for me.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Okay.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: I mean,

I completely hit my rock bottom.

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I could not, you know, I've

not lost anything physically.

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I've not lost my job.

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I've not lost my family, not lost my

husband or anything like that, but I'd

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look in the mirror and think, who's that?

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah,

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: is that?

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

you lose yourself, don't you?

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That's the thing.

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And if you've been through.

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The trauma of in and out of recovery

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Yeah.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: that then

not working, and then the feelings around

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relapse and all that, that must bring,

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Yeah.

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Yeah.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

very hard place to be.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

Oh, it was awful.

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And you do reach a point where, it was

just despair for me in the end, and

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I didn't know which way to turn, but

when I started looking into different

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sort of spirituality and things like

that, things started to change for

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me because it was where spirituality

led me really was to be able.

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To look at myself and take responsibility

and be accountable for my actions.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

was blaming everybody else for

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everything that was happening to me.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Right.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: I think

I was too afraid to be honest,

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and various different programs

that I engaged in over the years.

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You know, a part of that was.

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Was looking at yourself and

also looking at your past.

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Because I'm from a traumatic background.

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I had a traumatic childhood

because of my parents drinking,

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: know

today that trauma and drinking,

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there's a big connection, you know.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: When

we're traumatized as children,

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it does something to our brains.

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very often when you see people

who've got problems with drugs

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and alcohol or other addictions,

it can be rooted back in trauma.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: I.

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so through the years I've tried and,

embarked on all sorts of different

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spiritual things, you know, reiki,

and then not so long ago, I became

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a recovery coach myself, and I've

been helping other women mainly.

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To get sober and stay sober for

all the time that I've been sober.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: changed it

for me because I, I found, you know, some

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communities of recovering people around

me and I really threw myself into it.

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And for me, , the exact opposite

of addiction is connection.

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, Being connected to like-minded people,

knowing that they know how you feel and

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you hardly even have to say anything

and you're on the same wavelength.

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People who aren't gonna be judgmental

and say, well, just stop drinking.

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Just don't do it.

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and you think like, well,

why didn't I think of that?

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

Yeah, no shit.

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Sherlock, that would be helpful.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: It's

like, if only it was that easy, you

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know, it can be a long, long road.

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And I know today, in actual fact, you

know, that it's not necessary to have

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all the relapses that, that I had.

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I wasn't reaching out

for the right support.

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I didn't have a community.

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I wasn't in.

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Any kind of recovery program.

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But I would say this to anyone listening

who's looking for a recovery program.

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I believe you find what works for you,

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

but consistency and discipline

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is really important.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: being a

part of something, you know, I feel

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a part of in the recovery communities

that I engage with, you know, and

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again, that's the opposite to the

isolation where addiction took me,

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: So, I'm very

blessed because being a coach, I get to,

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you know, do bespoke recovery programs for

people and walk with them, you know, meet.

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Exactly where they are.

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I help people who are sober curious, and

I don't preach to them, you need to stop

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drinking or anything like that because,

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: you

know, we have to remember that

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some people can safely use alcohol.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: It

is not good to over drink and

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we live in this a drunk society.

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Right?

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Society is, I mean, we're

the minority for sure.

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The people who don't drink.

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However, there are a lot

of people who do drink.

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And they drink what I would

say they drink safely.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

Nothing happens to them

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because they don't over drink.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

but the binge drinking culture

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is, is getting worse and worse.

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And that's why I think there's a lot

of gray area drinkers who are not

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sure where, quite, where they belong.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: I

know that sobriety and total

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abstinence is the only way for me,

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: it took me

a long, long time to retrain my brain so

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that it, my default setting wasn't drink.

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'cause that's what I used to be like.

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It was like a GPS add, you know, set it to

go somewhere and it would reroute to the

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off license go somewhere and it would re.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

That does sound funny.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

That's exactly what it was for me.

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Even though I didn't even really wanna

go to the bloody off license, I was

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being rerouted there all the time.

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'cause I had a total, you know, a

powerlessness around alcohol really.

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I lost all willpower where that

was concerned and it took a

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long, long time for me to work

through different therapies.

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With different programs and look

at all my past stuff as well and

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deal with that before I could

get my feet firmly on the ground.

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But this is why I love helping people

today 'cause there's so many different

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sort of things people who've got

problems with drinking, need help with.

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Well, certainly I.

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Got totally lost along the way.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

so that's a great thing now

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about having, things like this.

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There's lots of sober

communities out there.

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you just try and find what works for you.

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But I would highly recommend to

everyone to find a sober community.

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That they can, be part of and

really engage in that community.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

so it's, so, yeah.

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Mm-hmm.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

the community thing comes up time

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and again, and there are, there's so

many out there, but I wouldn't, beat

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yourself up for it taking as long as

it took for you to, to be where you

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are because those communities didn't

necessarily exist until fairly recently.

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Really, in years is true because.

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I know that, the commu one of the

communities that I am part of, the

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sober Easters community, that was

set up because she found it such a

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struggle because there wasn't anything,

and that was only maybe five, six

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years ago, not really that long ago.

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So it's not really surprising that

it was such a struggle before.

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Without this, I don't think I would be.

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Sat here making this podcast

as an non-drinker if it hadn't

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have been for community.

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That was a massive part for me.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Yeah.

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Yeah.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: 'cause

I, part of my drinking was social

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and I liked being part of the group

and all of that kind of, you know,

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Yeah.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: alongside

with that same, probably with smoking,

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you know, I'd always be outside, you know.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Yeah.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

Finding then a community of people

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that I could hang out with not online.

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Some in life, a real life as well.

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Connections now was really central.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Yeah.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

craved it almost immediately.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

Oh, definitely.

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Yeah, a hundred percent.

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And that's the same with me.

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and I have a few, you know, I mean, I, I

engage in a few sober communities because

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I, I kind of offer to support them.

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

what I tend to do with.

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The ones that I engage with is I,

offer to do like free zoom support

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meetings so that once every fortnight

or however often we decide we hold

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space in a meeting for people.

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and that's been amazing as well, for

people to go online, because once

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you start to connect with people

online, then you get brave enough

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to connect with them in real life

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah,

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: and you

know, over the years, I've, I've.

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Been to largest loads of

different sober activities.

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I mean, I do everything

sober now that I used to do

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vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: yeah.

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sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

when I was drinking.

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You know, it just takes time.

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You know, for me, in the

beginning I had to sort of, I.

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What's the word I'm looking for?

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I had to have my community, but I had

to change my lifestyle a lot as well.

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I wasn't one of these who could get sober.

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I tried this and this is how

I'd ended up time and time again

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in rehab, in treatment, because

I'd, I'd go in, I'd get detoxed.

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I, I'd come out a few weeks

later, I'd be like, I'm fine now.

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I can go back out clubbing.

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I can do this.

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And then my mind would, would

go, well, one won't hurt.

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Just one won't hurt and

just one wouldn't have hurt.

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Hurt.

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:

But I forgot that I'd

never had one drink, ever.

338

:

Not even when I was a teenager.

339

:

I've never had one drink, and it's

not, that's never gonna change for me.

340

:

So I'd get caught out by that.

341

:

Mind going, one won't hurt.

342

:

It'll be fine.

343

:

You're not gonna get drunk.

344

:

You're only having one.

345

:

You don't, you're not gonna

end up back in treatment.

346

:

and for me, it would pull me

under again very, very quickly.

347

:

But I got like a master at

reestablishing order in my life.

348

:

You know, I'd have the most prodigious

bender and then I'd be able to so quickly.

349

:

Reestablish everything.

350

:

Get back to work, get this sorted out,

get that sorted out so that everything

351

:

on the outside looked amazing.

352

:

You know, I had an amazing job.

353

:

I looked after my daughter, I had

a brand new car, You know, all

354

:

the stuff that society says makes

us look like we're doing okay.

355

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

356

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: It's

rubbish because I was dying inside.

357

:

I truly was dying inside.

358

:

And, you know, I'm so grateful for all

these different, things and the kind

359

:

of stuff that you are doing here, Vic,

because it does give people hope that, you

360

:

know, we do recover as the tagline goes.

361

:

Sometimes, you know, it takes

people a little bit longer, but

362

:

there's a lot out there for people.

363

:

There's a lot out there for people.

364

:

And, there's lots of new research

coming out now, which I've been

365

:

very interested in actually.

366

:

And I've just done some additional

training for a technique, which I dunno

367

:

if you've heard of belief coding before.

368

:

You may have seen it on Facebook,

but basically that it's a technique

369

:

that can go back to, your early

years and your early trauma and,

370

:

and basically rewire your brain.

371

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Oh wow.

372

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: And it

helps you to overcome the trauma

373

:

that could be attached to things like

addiction and depression and anxiety.

374

:

So I've literally just been doing

some training in that because I'm,

375

:

you know, right into all of the brain

chemistry around it and how the neural

376

:

pathways, you know, we end up with a

brain that's, wired that way, and unless

377

:

that changes, but how do you do that?

378

:

How do you do well.

379

:

Thankfully, you know, neuroplasticity

and our brain's ability to rewire

380

:

can give us, with the right

techniques, opportunities to do that.

381

:

So I'm really exploring that around my

coaching at the moment, which I'm so

382

:

excited for because I would've loved

someone to come to me all those years

383

:

ago and said, just sit down Sharon.

384

:

We're gonna do some work.

385

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

recode your brain

386

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: it's,

and it sounds absolutely nuts.

387

:

It sounds crazy, right?

388

:

But it is actually scientifically

proven And it, it's so, so exciting.

389

:

So that's a.

390

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: I'm

quite interested in that actually.

391

:

I think, um,

392

:

is it William Porter?

393

:

It must be William Porter because he talks

a lot around the science, doesn't he?

394

:

And I remember.

395

:

Early days, discovering, sort of the

reason why that if you, if you're

396

:

someone that has been a drinker and then

you stop drinking and then you decide

397

:

to give it another go, so that little

voice says you can just have one, et

398

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Yeah,

399

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

When you have that one, your brain.

400

:

Goes back to the pathway, it doesn't

recognize there's been a gap.

401

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: no.

402

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: So it

automatically thinks you are gonna do

403

:

what you were gonna do and that's why

you end up over drinking very quickly.

404

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Absolutely.

405

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

I remember reading about it.

406

:

So the recoding thing is really

interesting 'cause I wonder does that

407

:

help to maybe mitigate that kind of

408

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Yeah, well,

I've literally just been accredited

409

:

in this technique, belief coding.

410

:

Literally just been accredited

after all my training and my

411

:

assessments and everything like that.

412

:

But during that process of being trained

and doing the accreditation, believe

413

:

coded several people around, alcohol.

414

:

Misuse.

415

:

and with some very interesting results.

416

:

You know, people who've stopped drinking

but then felt like, how do I go out?

417

:

How do I socialize?

418

:

And they go out and they've been trying

to rebuild a social life and find

419

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

420

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

overcome with social anxiety.

421

:

Not being able to talk to

people, feeling like they've got

422

:

two left feet when they dance.

423

:

I did a belief coding session actually

on this lady, and she said to me that she

424

:

was having exactly those kind of problems.

425

:

And one of the things I'm always

interested in is, you know, what can you

426

:

do to see if this worked, this technique

I know it works, but what can you do so

427

:

that you be, you know, and she said, well

actually I'm going to a, I'm going to

428

:

a family member's big birthday weekend.

429

:

I think it was a week

after we did the session.

430

:

and then in three weeks after that, she

had a hen party and she reported back

431

:

to me that her own sister had said to

her, who is this person we're out with?

432

:

Because

433

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Wow.

434

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: she,

her sister had actually said to her,

435

:

you've not been drinking, have you?

436

:

And she said, no.

437

:

She said, you know, I'm not drinking now.

438

:

And her sister was like, I know,

but you're like, you really?

439

:

We've got the old, you know.

440

:

Whatever her name is, we've

got, we've got it back.

441

:

We've got the old person back here.

442

:

she couldn't believe it.

443

:

She was absolutely gobsmacked.

444

:

so I'm really, really excited

to get going with that.

445

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

I'm excited to hear more about it.

446

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Well, we,

447

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

eye on that then.

448

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: yeah, we.

449

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: me.

450

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Oh, I'll do,

451

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

might even come to you

452

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: I'll share,

453

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

a session.

454

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

yeah, I'll share them with you.

455

:

But you can use it with literally,

anything, I've helped people overcome

456

:

all sorts of weird and wonderful things,

like fear of flying and stuff like that.

457

:

the technique itself is a kind of.

458

:

CBT positive psychology, NLP,

hypnosis, emotional freedom technique.

459

:

There's all sorts of things

all rolled into this.

460

:

Amazing technique.

461

:

they've had two papers published recently.

462

:

One in the American Journal of Psychiatry

and the other one in the International

463

:

Journal of Science and Research,

and there's gonna be a paper in the

464

:

British Medical Journal in November.

465

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Ah, okay.

466

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

So it's exciting, but I'll

467

:

send you the stuff, honestly,

468

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

I'd love to read that.

469

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

really interesting stuff.

470

:

So.

471

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

might help people to get

472

:

there quicker minded as well.

473

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Yes,

474

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: If

there was something because, and I think

475

:

that's actually, it's quite a joyful

thought, really, that, you know, we've,

476

:

we've found a way that's made it easier.

477

:

My experience of becoming an

non-drinker way better than

478

:

somebody probably 10 years ago or

479

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: yes.

480

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

years ago.

481

:

And somebody in the future,

hopefully theirs will be even

482

:

better there will be new techniques

and, new ways to support it.

483

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: And

this, this is a very scientifical,

484

:

a scientific, is that a word?

485

:

Scientific?

486

:

No, it's not scientific.

487

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

I love it though.

488

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

Yeah, it's actually, just add

489

:

that word to the dictionary.

490

:

No, it, it's scientifically proven.

491

:

And so there's, but for me as well,

being from a sort of woowoo, you

492

:

know, spiritual recovery angle, which

is where I, how I live my life, you

493

:

know, with the reiki and I do, and

meditation and all this kind of thing,

494

:

it's lovely because this technique is.

495

:

Scientific and spiritual

all at the same time.

496

:

It's beautiful.

497

:

Yeah, it's amazing.

498

:

So yeah.

499

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: tell

me a bit more about your spiritual side.

500

:

What's, what sort of things do you do

to support yourself and your happiness

501

:

and your sobriety spiritual wise?

502

:

Then do you have practices

503

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: yeah, I do.

504

:

I have like daily, what I

call my daily disciplines.

505

:

You know, I like to start my day in

a certain way, , as soon as I wake up

506

:

in the morning, I'll do a little bit

of self reiki, quiet time, and I just.

507

:

Put it out there to the universe

that we're having a good day, you

508

:

know, positivity, and I always sit

for five minutes and think about what

509

:

I'm grateful for going into the day.

510

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

511

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Because

no matter how, but I've actually

512

:

got another physical illness, which

can really debilitate me at times.

513

:

I have a blood disease.

514

:

so sometimes I'm digging deep for

that gratitude in any given day.

515

:

But, you know, I always start my day on

a positive note to be quiet, to connect

516

:

with the universe, whether that be like

with my grounding sheet or outside.

517

:

With my feet on the grass, do

a little bit of self reiki, a

518

:

gratitude list and some journaling.

519

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

520

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: and

then pretty much my journaling

521

:

practices at the beginning of the day.

522

:

And at the end of the day, I kind of

reflect on my day and how it's been.

523

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

524

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: have I

been kind and loving towards all people

525

:

around and, , have I done my best?

526

:

what can I do better?

527

:

What can I correct the next day if I

might have, been strappy with my husband

528

:

or whatever, which happens most days.

529

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

Oh, that happens everywhere.

530

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: I just

try and live by, I guess it's like by

531

:

spiritual principles and reiki principles

really, you know, just try and, you

532

:

know, not, I mean, I'm a completely

different person to what I was.

533

:

I really and truly am.

534

:

I used to be, no, I've never been not

a nice person or a, what's the word?

535

:

I was very irritable.

536

:

And like flying off the handle and,

agitated and quite self-centered

537

:

really, it was always about

how I felt about me, you know?

538

:

Whereas now, I'm happy to say that I

think a lot more about other people.

539

:

I think a lot more about how I can help

other people and how they're feeling

540

:

and, that gets me out of my own worries.

541

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

542

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Which I have

a lot of with health problems at times,

543

:

but helping other people just keeps me

away from that and it's such a joy as

544

:

well to help other people, particularly

people who are, coming in and need help

545

:

to get sober because it's just no worse

place to be in the world when you are

546

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: No.

547

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: To be able

to reach your hand out to someone and

548

:

help them and then watch them transform

in front of your eyes is just an amazing.

549

:

Experience one that I've

had hundreds of times.

550

:

so that's the way I live, live my life.

551

:

But yeah, I do a lot of meditation.

552

:

I do a lot of reiki, sound

baths, things like that.

553

:

I've run spiritual retreats, within

some of the sober communities that,

554

:

that I've, I, I kind of support.

555

:

We've arranged retreats before

at beautiful places where

556

:

we've had, you know, drumming

circles and fires and, you know,

557

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

sounds amazing.

558

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

sorts of stuff.

559

:

ma it's mainly been women.

560

:

It, it, they're not totally

women communities that I'm in.

561

:

but it tends to be women that wanna

do all that woo woo stuff, isn't it?

562

:

Like spiritual retreats, just one day

retreats where people have come and we've

563

:

just, you know, and again, being in that,

being around like-minded people for a day.

564

:

So I've done lots of things like that.

565

:

and Yeah.

566

:

But Journaling's a big

part of it for me as well,

567

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah,

568

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: you know.

569

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: I know

lots of people who write morning pages,

570

:

part of their, recovery and just sanity.

571

:

I think now that they're the ones

recovered, I think a lot of them are,

572

:

quite far down the line like yourself.

573

:

But keeps 'em sane and it feels to me

574

:

My journey through this whole thing

and almost everyone I speak to, but you

575

:

in particular, there is a completely

opposing life that you end up in.

576

:

So you go from this chaotic, loud,

difficult, confusing, spirally

577

:

existence to somewhere where you are

really living this really authentic,

578

:

lovely, calm, purposeful life.

579

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Yeah.

580

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

it's the complete opposite,

581

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: It,

582

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: And

583

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

it's the complete opposite.

584

:

I mean, when I look back now, it really

is like I'm talking about someone else

585

:

and I can remember in early sobriety

when, things really started to change

586

:

for me, I remember being quite worried

thinking, this can't be this good.

587

:

It can't possibly last because I've been

so stuck and so miserable for so long.

588

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

589

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: know, but

you get out what you put in and it is

590

:

about, you know, looking at yourself.

591

:

For me, I had to look myself square in

the face and admit for the first time

592

:

in my life that maybe I was the problem,

593

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

594

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

maybe I needed to do.

595

:

A, B and C therapy, my big girl's pants

on and look at myself in the mirror.

596

:

Maybe I had to do that, but I'd been

running uc and that was no fault of my own

597

:

because environmental stuff in my early

life that, Had caused me, for want of a

598

:

better word, to be very, survival led.

599

:

You know, let's just get

on, let's just get on.

600

:

Let's just, you know, nevermind

that, nevermind that, you

601

:

know, and I, and, and I was

602

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

flight, weren't you?

603

:

You

604

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

absolutely, absolutely, you know,

605

:

and I was always a big achiever

with everything I did, you know?

606

:

'cause I was always so bloody determined

607

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

608

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: was gonna

succeed with everything I wanted to do.

609

:

When I couldn't stop drinking,

that was a big bloody shock to me.

610

:

I was like, what?

611

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Me?

612

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: From anything?

613

:

But I couldn't beat it.

614

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: No.

615

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

Couldn't beat it.

616

:

And I've never met anyone who's kind of.

617

:

Done it on their own.

618

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Hmm.

619

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

know, I've never met anyone

620

:

who's done it on their own.

621

:

So I can't stress enough really that, the

right support, wherever you get that from.

622

:

And even the NHS and stuff now,

the NHS are really, really good

623

:

with helping those gray area

drinkers that you would talk about,

624

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Mm-hmm.

625

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: because

sometimes, like with problem drinking,

626

:

what I've learned and my experiences,

627

:

And what I've seen as a coach is

it's a scale, you know, and you get

628

:

some people who can learn to control

their drinking just by, doing a few

629

:

different practices and whatever.

630

:

And then you get people who the only

way forward is abstinence and how to.

631

:

Sober.

632

:

and you're right, I live an

absolute joyful life, you know?

633

:

So now I get to look after my

grandchildren who are two and seven.

634

:

in the past, it's not a very nice

thing to admit, but there's no

635

:

way on this earth she would've

had me looking after her children.

636

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: No,

637

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: No way.

638

:

So, you know, I get to be present

and live, my life with my family

639

:

instead of just being, trying to

hide away or whatever the word is.

640

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

641

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: So

642

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

You got a new sat nav

643

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: I definitely

644

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: things.

645

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: recorded,

but that was before belief code

646

:

and when I originally found belief

code and I was like, this is

647

:

the missing piece of the jigsaw.

648

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

649

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: sure.

650

:

And so I dove right in, right into that.

651

:

but yeah, my brain has definitely,

been rewired and, I consider

652

:

myself to be recovered from.

653

:

Alcoholism, or the word you might wanna

use, recovered from problem drinking.

654

:

Because where I might still have

problems in my life who doesn't,

655

:

I'm able to overcome them.

656

:

I've got tools, I've got techniques,

I've got strength now to overcome

657

:

most obstacles that are put

in my way, with the support.

658

:

from people around me and it's great.

659

:

I mean, anybody who is

struggling, reach out,

660

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

661

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: reach out.

662

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

And just as our final, support for

663

:

anyone who's listening who might be

struggling, you said that you are

664

:

part of lots of sober communities.

665

:

Could you just name a couple for us, just

so that someone's looking for something,

666

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Yeah.

667

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: in?

668

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Yeah,

I mean one of the great ones, is

669

:

peachy af and that is, Peachy alcohol

free, but obviously it's got that

670

:

naughty bit attached to it as well.

671

:

And then the Sober Society uk,

that's a very, very good group.

672

:

They're the ones that I mainly engage

with, currently and do the support

673

:

meetings from, anybody can contact me by

going to back on track recovery co uk.

674

:

Various things on there to look at.

675

:

you can also join Zoom meetings with PTAF,

also with society on a fortnightly basis.

676

:

you can join them by going to my website.

677

:

You don't have to have the Zoom app.

678

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

679

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323:

So yeah, you can do that.

680

:

But both those communities are an amazing

support, and growing all the time.

681

:

one of the things I'm looking at with,

both of those groups is, doing some

682

:

sobriety courses, but that's sort of

something that's in the pipeline as well.

683

:

It's gonna be coming up.

684

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Yeah.

685

:

Well, it sounds amazing.

686

:

I also am a member of Sober Society to uk.

687

:

I haven't joined Peach GAF, but I

will, now that you've mentioned it.

688

:

Thank you.

689

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Yes.

690

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

But yeah, sober society to uk

691

:

Actually Mikey has been on here,

692

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Yes.

693

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: and he

did say to me recently maybe we could

694

:

do something together with the podcast

as well, just as a tool for people.

695

:

So,

696

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Yeah.

697

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: you

might find that we end up somehow on

698

:

that Facebook group with the podcast,

but that's, that's for the future.

699

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: Yeah.

700

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324: Sarah,

thank you so much for spending your time

701

:

with us tonight and telling your story.

702

:

It's so positive.

703

:

It's actually very

calming listening to you.

704

:

It's been a really peaceful conversation.

705

:

There's definitely a nice vibe about you.

706

:

I've really enjoyed it.

707

:

Hopefully someone listening

it's thinking, right?

708

:

That's it.

709

:

gonna make a change and they're

gonna, they're gonna contact

710

:

one of those groups and do it.

711

:

So thanks again.

712

:

sharon_1_06-10-2025_180323: You so welcome

and if I can do it, anybody can do it.

713

:

Love everyone out there who's on this

journey and thank you for asking me.

714

:

vic-host327_1_06-10-2025_180324:

are welcome.

715

:

Lovely way to end.

716

:

Bye Sharon.

717

:

Bye.

718

:

Thank you for listening.

719

:

To Sabre alcohol-free stories.

720

:

If this episode helped you,

Please like share and follow.

721

:

Or leave a review on pod chaser.

722

:

Dot com.

723

:

And if you've got a story to

tell, please contact me on Sabre.

724

:

A F stories@outlook.com.

725

:

And don't forget.

726

:

You can make your catch phrase.

727

:

I don't drink.

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About the Podcast

Sober, Alcohol Free Stories
"I Don't Drink"
If you’ve ever googled “do I drink too much” this podcast is for you!

This is for those of you who end up wondering what’s wrong with you, questioning how your friends can possibly drink so slowly, or worse can just have one with dinner (aliens). For those of you who have tried to moderate, just a Thursday, only red wine, not before 6, not after 9, not if I’m wearing blue 😊

For those of you who secretly don’t enjoy the theatre because you know the show will be an interruption to a booze filled evening. For those who fall out with loved ones, lose handbags, feel lonely or shameful the morning after, wear sunglasses on the school run, or enjoy way too many mints for an average human. For those who need something to change but feel it it’s impossible to break up with their loyal companion – booze.

The good news is you are NOT weird, or alone, there’s millions of us, just like you. You CAN stop drinking alcohol. I know this because until Jan 2022 I was all the above, and now “I don’t drink”.

In this podcast we will delve in to what it takes to become alcohol free in a society that’s quite frankly obsessed with drinking! I’ll talk to people just like you and me, some near the beginning of their alcohol-free life, and some further along, but all with one thing in common, the courage to stare booze in the face and say NO, NOT ME, NOT ANYMORE! They will share their sliding doors moments, regrets, loves, pink clouds and the tools that have helped them to succeed.

We will show you that life without the “wine witch” is actually pretty amazing, how we all thought we were losing something, but what we have gained is insurmountable. We will share how our lives transformed, skin began to glow, sleep became deep and relaxing, bodies became healthy, relationships flourished, careers progressed, and our minds were at peace. WE will show you that you deserve the chance to be happy and free and turn what may seem impossible into possible.

Listen along and join me in making your catchphrase “I don’t drink”.

About your host

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VICTORIA Banat