Episode 12

Vic and Anne - Sober, Alcohol Free Stories and becoming the Bright eyed sober girl!

Published on: 6th December, 2024

Today I talk to Anne who as a child swore she would never drink having experienced the turbulence of having a parent who did. Anne soon realised in adulthood that she too was turning to alcohol to soothe stress and anxiety. Anne is now alcohol free, has found peace and solace in Jesus and has replaced her anxious existence with a fabulous legacy to her Dad in her Instagram account the Bright eyed Sober Girl!

Transcript
Speaker:

Hi everybody, I'm Victoria

and I don't drink.

2

:

Today I'm going to talk to Anne, who as

a child had sworn she would never drink

3

:

the liquid that had stolen her dad.

4

:

Ironically, in adulthood she found

herself realising that her life had become

5

:

unmanageable due to her own drinking.

6

:

Anne found solace in Jesus and in her

father's memory, transforming her anxious

7

:

existence into one of serenity as the

bright eyed sober girl that she is today.

8

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: hi Anne.

9

:

Thank you so much for joining me today.

10

:

all the way from the USA,

which is very exciting.

11

:

good to have you on.

12

:

I've connected with you because a friend

of mine, as I told you, had seen you

13

:

on Instagram and thought your post

looked wonderful and told me all about

14

:

you and I had a look at your Instagram

and just thought your life looked as

15

:

bright as I feel like mine has become.

16

:

Since I stopped drinking and I

really thought I had to talk to you.

17

:

So that's why I connected with you.

18

:

And thank you for agreeing

to come talk to me.

19

:

As always, I'm going to hand over to you.

20

:

I just want to know all about

your story and how you got here.

21

:

And then we'll talk about some

of the wonderful things that

22

:

it has brought you afterwards.

23

:

So handing over to you.

24

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

Oh, thank you so much.

25

:

I feel so honored anytime I'm ever

asked to be a guest on a podcast.

26

:

It's just a full circle moment

for me because I'm two years and

27

:

one month and 16 days sober today.

28

:

And when I think, back to my life.

29

:

When I was using alcohol, this

was just not even an option.

30

:

So a lot can change quite quickly,

when we remove alcohol from our life.

31

:

And so it's just, it's an honor

and I'm so happy to get to

32

:

be here and to get to share.

33

:

So I'll just jump in.

34

:

my sober date is October 4th, 2022.

35

:

I stopped, one day after my

35th birthday and I had, grown

36

:

up in a small town in Kentucky.

37

:

And I had wonderful, I had a wonderful

mom, wonderful grandparents, but.

38

:

father really struggled

with drugs and alcohol.

39

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: hmm, mm hmm,

mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm

40

:

hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm,

mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm

41

:

hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm

hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm

42

:

hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm

hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm

43

:

hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm

hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm

44

:

hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm

hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm

45

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

I would make these huge declarations to

46

:

myself that I would never drink alcohol,

that I would never be like him at all.

47

:

Um, I loved him, his disease, and it

just, felt crushing as a child to watch

48

:

your dad struggle so bad with, a liquid.

49

:

You know, that's what it felt like to me.

50

:

Just this stupid liquid that always

got, more attention than my mom and I.

51

:

And it was hard.

52

:

And so, fast forward a bit though,

um, As life went on, my dad ended up

53

:

getting arrested and sent to prison,

because of a lot of drug involvement.

54

:

He was selling drugs, using drugs.

55

:

I mean, it was a mess.

56

:

But he ended up getting arrested

and sent to prison when I was 15.

57

:

obviously that's a pretty traumatic thing

to have happen to you as a 15 year old.

58

:

I think I just sort of let my guard down

a bit and curiosity got the best of me

59

:

because my friends were starting to drink.

60

:

I honestly, just wanted to know

what it was about this liquid

61

:

that made everyone want it.

62

:

Um, so.

63

:

So I got drunk, when I was 15 years

old, at a friend's house and blacked

64

:

out, have no memory of it really.

65

:

I woke up that next day and I thought,

nope, I'll never do that again.

66

:

That was absolutely awful.

67

:

I don't know why people do this

but it just slowly progressed and

68

:

I kind of learned how to quote

unquote drink it, not chug it.

69

:

And it gave me that false

sense of confidence.

70

:

it felt like that missing piece.

71

:

You know, I was like, Oh, I

understand why people like this now.

72

:

But from that moment, like from 15 in

my gut, I feel like I knew, Oh, I don't,

73

:

I don't really need to be doing this.

74

:

because there was that disconnect

within myself, even as a young teen.

75

:

That I told myself as a 10 year

old, I would never do this.

76

:

but it didn't really get bad for me

until I was in my early twenties.

77

:

I went to college and

went through a breakup.

78

:

I feel like college is just a gateway,

because of this freedom you have, um,

79

:

you know, you don't have anyone you you

should or shouldn't do something, and

80

:

I turned to alcohol, I was partying a

lot, I was just doing things that sober

81

:

me would never do, so it was chipping

away at my self worth, my confidence,

82

:

and was, my mental health was suffering

so badly, I didn't have any tools.

83

:

I had no coping skills, so

I just turned to alcohol.

84

:

I just kept turning to alcohol, and it

was really in that season of my life

85

:

when I was in my early twenties I, I feel

like I started to really recognize that

86

:

this was not going in a good direction.

87

:

I don't think I could connect the dot

that it was, causing this extreme anxiety

88

:

and depression, but I knew I was drinking

too much, and I knew that wasn't healthy.

89

:

I had no idea how much it

was truly affecting me.

90

:

during that timeframe, I just

really decided I needed help, but

91

:

I did not know how to ask for it.

92

:

And I'm sure people listening.

93

:

Can understand what that feels like

it's that feeling of isolation and

94

:

you're the only one and and this in my

early 20s And so I'm gonna pause for

95

:

a second because I need to back up a

little bit so when my dad was in prison

96

:

This is like When I was in my twenties,

he had given his life to Christ and

97

:

that's a big part of my story now and

why I named it the Bride I'd Sober Girl.

98

:

He ended up getting saved in prison, by

two women who were doing a local outreach.

99

:

every time they saw him, they

would call him Bride I's.

100

:

They said, Hey Bride I's, like,

we're so happy to see you.

101

:

It softened him enough to be

able to receive the truth of who

102

:

he was that he wasn't just this

criminal and he wasn't this addict.

103

:

And, you know, it really, when he told

me that, struck a nerve in me because

104

:

I was also doing the exact same thing.

105

:

I felt like I was in a prison myself.

106

:

I felt like I was turning to

something that was, so much harm.

107

:

just didn't know how to get out.

108

:

he was sort of behind the scenes

praying for me that I would turn

109

:

my life over and give it to Jesus.

110

:

I didn't grow up in church.

111

:

I did not.

112

:

Like Jesus sort of felt

like Santa Claus to me.

113

:

Like it sounded so good in theory,

but it felt more like a character.

114

:

um, but now I'm going to fast forward

back when I was, in my drinking

115

:

phase, I was also in beauty school.

116

:

I'm a hairstylist.

117

:

And, but one night after I'd been

drinking, just so drunk, I was, I'd felt

118

:

fallen down, a girl in beauty school.

119

:

I knew she was a Christian, but I didn't

really know what it was about her.

120

:

I just knew she always had peace

and was very calm and sound.

121

:

And so my dad had been praying for me.

122

:

in prison, for at least a year for

me to, surrender my life to Jesus.

123

:

And I ended up asking her if we

could meet up at a coffee shop

124

:

and, she said yes, of course.

125

:

And ended up meeting up and

I came in just so hungover.

126

:

I just started bawling, crying.

127

:

And said, I don't want to keep doing this.

128

:

my life is just like falling apart.

129

:

I'm drinking too much, partying too much.

130

:

And she just like, I'll never forget it.

131

:

She just said, you know, Ann,

you've tried a lot of things,

132

:

but you've never tried Jesus.

133

:

we went to my car and I gave my life

to Christ in a Starbucks parking lot.

134

:

after that, I share that part because,

That's truly where I got the name,

135

:

The Bright Eyes Sober Girl, from,

because it's, you know, those two women

136

:

ministering to my dad, just calling him

bright eyes, and then me finding, Jesus

137

:

in beauty school, but giving my life to

Christ in a parking lot is just wild.

138

:

The whole thing's crazy.

139

:

but then after that, so

this is my early twenties.

140

:

I just continued partying I think

that process of truly surrendering

141

:

and laying down what the Lord

had been asking me to lay down.

142

:

took years because.

143

:

For eight more years.

144

:

I just continued doing life on my terms

and doing what I wanted I knew deep

145

:

down the Lord was asking me to surrender

and lay alcohol down but I didn't want

146

:

to like I just loved a buzz and when I

really thought figure out this moderation

147

:

that everyone talked about I wasn't

partying and drinking a ton anymore.

148

:

I wasn't hiding in a closet drinking.

149

:

I wasn't drinking every day, but when I

would drink, I just had no off switch.

150

:

It just became, this cycle of guilt

and shame and deep down knowing that I

151

:

had so much more in me than hangovers.

152

:

I just felt like the Lord was knocking

on my heart all the time saying You've

153

:

got to surrender to this or I'm never

going to be able to give you more.

154

:

And so that's where it brings

th,:

155

:

We went out for my 35th birthday

and, nothing crazy happened.

156

:

sometimes you hear people's stories

and you think they had a terrible car

157

:

wreck their marriage was ending or

they were going to lose their kids.

158

:

It wasn't that for me.

159

:

It was, I just truly woke up, hung over on

the couch, and I just like knew in my gut,

160

:

in my bones, I could not keep doing this.

161

:

my daughters at the time

were seven and nine.

162

:

And I started having those childhood

trauma triggers resurface because I was

163

:

around the same age that I had made these

huge declarations to myself as a 10 year

164

:

old that I would never be like my father.

165

:

And here I was a 35 year old mom on

the couch, And I just looked at my

166

:

daughters and thought, I cannot do this.

167

:

I want to model what adulthood

looks like without alcohol.

168

:

I want to teach them how to do this.

169

:

I just told my husband that

morning, I said, you know, I'm done.

170

:

I think he thought I was serious,

but I also think he had heard me

171

:

say it before, but that time I just,

I knew in my gut that I was done.

172

:

after that, I threw myself

into learning about alcohol.

173

:

learning about the science of

alcohol, what it did to the

174

:

brain, what it did to the body.

175

:

and that was mind blowing.

176

:

I always thought it just,

Oh, it just hurts your liver.

177

:

I had absolutely no idea about how

horrible it was for my mental health,

178

:

how horrible it was, physically.

179

:

I was having a lot of, joint pain, A

lot of inflammation from the alcohol.

180

:

I kept thinking, I don't know what I

thought, maybe age, but I'm not that old,

181

:

you know, but it just, it was terrible.

182

:

And, just motivated me so much.

183

:

Once I heard the science and once I heard

people share their stories on podcasts and

184

:

that's why now, anytime I'm asked to be a

guest, it's such an honor because I truly.

185

:

That is, um, for nine months, I.

186

:

Would listen to podcasts and listen

to other women and men share their

187

:

stories of hope and how they did it.

188

:

just gave me so much hope,

so much encouragement, and

189

:

I knew it could be done.

190

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: hmm you

191

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115: and

that, so that's just a little bit about

192

:

like the backstory of my life and, how now

I feel like anytime I can share my story.

193

:

about becoming sober.

194

:

I just always hope that it's worth it.

195

:

It's a sliver of light for someone

who might be struggling listening

196

:

because I really, um, I clung

to podcasts in the beginning.

197

:

I mean, it is how I got sober.

198

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yeah,

I completely agree with that.

199

:

I was a podcast listener as well,

which is why I'm doing this because

200

:

I walked and walked and walked and

listened and listened and listened and

201

:

I couldn't get enough of listening to

people who'd done it, but not just for

202

:

the hope that it's possible because

I knew that I was going to do it.

203

:

I'm quite determined.

204

:

I knew this is it I've decided, but

also because it made me feel less weird.

205

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

Yeah.

206

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: so many things

that I thought, Oh, it's probably just me.

207

:

You know, the chatter when you're

thinking, Oh, I wonder if I could

208

:

get another drink or why is everyone

drinking so slow or all of those things.

209

:

And then all of a sudden you're listening

to all these women who are saying,

210

:

Oh, yeah, I can't moderate either.

211

:

I don't have an off switch.

212

:

I thought that was just me,

there's something wrong with me.

213

:

So.

214

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

And that's, I remember when I would

215

:

hear podcasts and the people sharing it.

216

:

Yes.

217

:

It made me feel so less alone.

218

:

Like I wasn't.

219

:

And it normalized it and you

don't have to be under a bridge.

220

:

You don't have to have

these crazy rock bottoms.

221

:

Because for me, I would compare my

drinking to my father and I would

222

:

think, oh, well, I'm not as bad as him.

223

:

it kept me stuck, honestly.

224

:

I knew I wasn't as bad as

my dad, but I was miserable.

225

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yeah,

we have that in common as well.

226

:

So my dad was also a drinker my

dad unfortunately got dementia and

227

:

became, quite unwell, quite young.

228

:

Um, and he has since passed

away, I know that he really

229

:

struggled with it I did not want.

230

:

that, because I knew how much that

upset me when you were talking,

231

:

there was so many things you said

that I was thinking, Oh, I mean,

232

:

my dad did not end up in prison.

233

:

So that, you know, the stories are

different in that sense, but the feeling

234

:

is there I wouldn't want for my children

to feel how I felt because it was really

235

:

hard And I don't believe it was his fault.

236

:

I know that this is a really

hard thing once it grips.

237

:

And he did say to me that he

wouldn't wish it on anyone.

238

:

I know that he wanted to stop

and he actually couldn't.

239

:

so for me, this is also a

bit of a legacy for him.

240

:

It's really nice to be able

to say, yeah, we did it, dad.

241

:

You know, in the end,

one of us did it anyway.

242

:

And actually my brother also

doesn't drink, which is fabulous.

243

:

I'm hoping to get him on

my podcast at some point.

244

:

yeah, that's, that's fairly new.

245

:

He's become a sober

coach, which is exciting.

246

:

So lots of things you've said

have really resonated with me.

247

:

It's nice to hear your story and again,

just, Someone else who felt like I

248

:

did and how strange that all these

people around the world are sitting,

249

:

maybe feeling the way that we were

feeling and thinking they're alone.

250

:

Well, really they're not.

251

:

There's so many people in

that boat, isn't there?

252

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

There really is.

253

:

And, yes, I can also relate

to my dad was in prison for 8.

254

:

5 years and he was released

he sadly passed away of a

255

:

heart disease 10 years ago.

256

:

So I'm with you.

257

:

It's sort of legacy,

258

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yes.

259

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

help people.

260

:

And that's really my heart behind why I

created the bright ad sober girl, because

261

:

I just know people struggle and I this

desire within me to, to help other women

262

:

get off of that hamster wheel cycle

263

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yeah.

264

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

the mental gymnastics and the shame

265

:

and the guilt and the anxiety and just

266

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yeah.

267

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

I just knew deep down I wanted

268

:

to do something to be able to

help people, um, get out of that.

269

:

Pip.

270

:

Um,

271

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115:

well, just telling your story.

272

:

It really does.

273

:

It really helps.

274

:

And you and I know that because

we've been on the end of it.

275

:

However, you listened to yours.

276

:

I walked and listened and it gave me

the hope and I'm sure the same for you.

277

:

So, you know, it works.

278

:

thank you.

279

:

It's really, it's really

great that you're doing it.

280

:

I was thinking, um, When you were

talking earlier, you were saying about

281

:

the calm, how you wanted the calm thing.

282

:

And I was speaking to somebody else

about this the other day, how you,

283

:

you kind of drank when you want, you

wanted this sort of calm feeling.

284

:

in the end, you only really

get that when you stop.

285

:

you were looking for that and

you found Jesus, which is an

286

:

amazing tool for you and has

obviously supported you through it.

287

:

What other tools have you used?

288

:

what did you need to do to

actually stop to get through the

289

:

witching hours and to manage those

initial, beginning few months?

290

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

I love that question because it's

291

:

evolved, over the last few years.

292

:

Two years, but I will say in the

very beginning, it truly was podcast

293

:

and downloading, books on audible.

294

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yeah,

295

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

Like I said this learning the science

296

:

truly helped rewire my brain I think.

297

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: yeah.

298

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

stopped viewing it as a punishment and

299

:

I started to view it as a privilege.

300

:

It was just such a gift, but I had to

learn to rewire my brain and I did that

301

:

by I would walk also, like you said,

I would walk and listen to podcasts.

302

:

I would cook and listen to podcasts.

303

:

I would get ready and listen to podcasts.

304

:

that was my number one tool, the podcast.

305

:

But then also for me, like you said,

I mean, church is important to me.

306

:

So going to church, I think another

big tool I used, was therapy.

307

:

got into, a trauma counselor who's really

helped me, just helped me uncover a

308

:

lot that I push down, you know, and I,

and really honest about it all, I think

309

:

most people are trying to cope with

some type of, there's a root usually,

310

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yeah.

311

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

causing them to drink.

312

:

And so doing the therapy work,

has really helped so much.

313

:

I, Oh, and another thing that helped

a lot, I think connection is huge

314

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Mm-Hmm.

315

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

that is the cure.

316

:

I really think once people realize they're

not alone, it's like the magic happens.

317

:

And so I joined an online sober group

318

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Mm-Hmm.

319

:

. Mm-Hmm.

320

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

and so it's connecting with other

321

:

women in real life, who also going

through the exact same thing you are.

322

:

And it's just this instant connection,

323

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yeah.

324

:

Mm-Hmm.

325

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

because you know, you're not alone

326

:

and you're watching other women who

so normal, who aren't under a bridge,

327

:

losing everything, kind of come out of

this hole they feel like they've been

328

:

in and you're watching it in real time.

329

:

So it's so inspiring.

330

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: I think you

have such a respect for anyone, don't you?

331

:

Who's doing it Because you know what

it takes to sort of realize and make

332

:

those decisions and stick to them, and

it is such an empowering thing to do.

333

:

But it can be hard at the start.

334

:

And I know what you mean

about the connections that

335

:

you have with those people.

336

:

It feels like a family

type feeling, isn't it?

337

:

It's almost like you, they're not, they're

not friends in the way that your other

338

:

friends are your friends, but there's

something very different about it.

339

:

Magic is a good word to use because

there is some magical connection that

340

:

you can't really describe, but it's

almost like you just want to reach

341

:

out and grab them and go, well done.

342

:

And you're amazing.

343

:

And.

344

:

And look at all the stuff that you've

done and that you can become and all.

345

:

It's a, it's a really, it's a really great

community to be in the sober community.

346

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

it really is.

347

:

I think just knowing,

yeah, you're not alone.

348

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yeah.

349

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115: I am

so involved in the sober world now that I

350

:

truly see it and hear it every single day.

351

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yeah.

352

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

you're not the only one struggling.

353

:

So like your listeners, really hope they

hear that today in my story, like you

354

:

are not the only one who is struggling

and not have to keep doing this.

355

:

And you do.

356

:

Doing it alone.

357

:

it's just, I think having the courage

to surrender it and accept that

358

:

you just cannot drink alcohol, it's

not going to help anything and then

359

:

really with other women or men, you

know, . I just hope they hear that

360

:

cause that's really important to me

361

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yeah.

362

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

like they're just not alone in it.

363

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yeah.

364

:

And I think also what you said around.

365

:

It doesn't have to have reached

a stage where you've lost

366

:

everything for you to do that.

367

:

I think I definitely fell

into grey area drinking.

368

:

I wasn't somebody who was

drinking in the mornings.

369

:

I didn't, you know, I didn't

necessarily drink every single day.

370

:

I mean, I drank a lot of days, but

I didn't fall under that category.

371

:

You know, people always

ask you, don't they?

372

:

And I, Oh, were you an alcoholic?

373

:

And it's like, well, I don't really know.

374

:

Like, I don't really know what that

is, but I certainly wasn't somebody

375

:

who was in huge amounts of trouble,

but I did regularly wake up and feel

376

:

regretful and shameful and my anxiety

was high and I wish that I hadn't

377

:

done it and I wanted to be a healthier

person and all of those things, and

378

:

that should be reason enough for you.

379

:

You know, if you make that decision,

you can make it based on that.

380

:

You can just once.

381

:

To be better and to be happier.

382

:

and it will give you that if you're

feeling those ways, then stopping

383

:

doing it will definitely give you that.

384

:

It just take a bit time to recover.

385

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

Well, and that what you just said

386

:

about like, oh, are they, do they

think you're an alcoholic or, you

387

:

know, I was the exact same way.

388

:

I didn't drink every day.

389

:

I didn't even drink every weekend,

but like I said, when I would

390

:

drink, I just had no off switch.

391

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: No.

392

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

to stop drinking, I was so afraid of

393

:

what everyone was going to think of me.

394

:

What were the labels they

were going to put on me?

395

:

Would they think In the

closet drinking all the time.

396

:

And honestly, because I just kept

trying to figure out moderation and

397

:

it never worked and so I think once

you just, like I said, like before,

398

:

but once you just really surrender it

399

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yeah.

400

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

my gosh, it really is a privilege.

401

:

It is not a punishment.

402

:

My life is so different now,

and it is so much better.

403

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yeah.

404

:

Moderation sucks.

405

:

it's not a thing that I think very

many people can really do, even

406

:

the ones who think they can do it.

407

:

I don't think they can because

there's always that little,

408

:

Oh, I'll just have one more.

409

:

we've all been there many times, I'm sure.

410

:

And tell me a bit about your life now.

411

:

So tell me about the

Bright Eyed Sober Girl.

412

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115: the

bright answer, girl, my life now is think

413

:

the best way is just calm and peaceful.

414

:

And really is.

415

:

I feel like I know myself now.

416

:

I can be the mother that I know.

417

:

I can lay my head down at night

and know I'm doing a good job

418

:

and I'm modeling behavior.

419

:

to my children that I

would want them to mimic.

420

:

That's why there was this disconnect

when I would drink because I just

421

:

never wanted my girls to, think

that adulthood meant alcohol.

422

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yeah.

423

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

I feel so grateful that

424

:

I get to do this work.

425

:

I love it.

426

:

I never in a million years thought

I would be talking about sobriety,

427

:

let alone create an account to help

other women, but it's just been a

428

:

real gift and I think that's also

how I would say my life is now.

429

:

It's like a gift

430

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Mm hmm.

431

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

I don't try to hide from

432

:

my real life anymore.

433

:

I love, I love it.

434

:

I love the simplicity.

435

:

I love the peace and joy I

have now and it's all real.

436

:

So

437

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yeah.

438

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

of it's a counterfeit.

439

:

None of it is that fake dopamine

hit I'm receiving from alcohol.

440

:

it's all real and I'm so grateful

and I never would have been able to

441

:

do it unless I had removed alcohol.

442

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: They say

that if you create a life that you

443

:

don't want to run away from, then,

then you're going to have made it.

444

:

You don't need it.

445

:

You don't need to drink anything.

446

:

why would you need to change

anything or buzz anything up?

447

:

You don't have to, because,

because you get up every day

448

:

and enjoy everything you have.

449

:

it's really obvious that you do.

450

:

You know, you can, you can

tell, I can see it in your face.

451

:

you're very smiley clearly very calm and

at peace with yourself, which is lovely.

452

:

And it's brilliant that you're

sharing it with everybody.

453

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

Yeah.

454

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: what

were the books that you taught?

455

:

But you said there was a, you

said you listened to podcasts.

456

:

if you were going to say a couple of

top podcasts that really helped you,

457

:

maybe a couple of those science based

books might be useful for people to know

458

:

about somebody that might want to pick

something up tomorrow and just explore it.

459

:

what ones would you recommend?

460

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

The first book, I ever read,

461

:

and it's my favorite one for

alcohol is, This Naked Mind by

462

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yes.

463

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

Gray.

464

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Yes.

465

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115: It's

a lot of science in it, and I loved that.

466

:

So that book, and then for podcast,

one of my favorites is Sober Powered.

467

:

her name is Jill.

468

:

She's a scientist.

469

:

And so again, it was just a lot of science

and like the why behind why you were

470

:

doing things that was really, really cool.

471

:

I love sober motivation.

472

:

I love, so with sisters.

473

:

That's an incredible That's

actually the group I'm in.

474

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Okay.

475

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115: and

476

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Give them

a shout out so that anyone can join.

477

:

is it a group people can join?

478

:

Yeah.

479

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

Absolutely.

480

:

of course.

481

:

Um, and I actually get to

help host meetings now.

482

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Amazing.

483

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

it's really neat.

484

:

So those are a few of the

podcasts, but, sober mom life

485

:

is another one I really enjoy.

486

:

Now, thank goodness.

487

:

And, and, and just like hers, I

I'm so I had downloaded yours and

488

:

I can't wait to listen to more

489

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Wow.

490

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115: I've

loved them because I love the stories.

491

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115:

I love the stories too.

492

:

I also needed the science so,

have you heard of William Porter?

493

:

Alcohol

494

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115: have

495

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Explained.

496

:

Yeah.

497

:

So he joined me on a podcast a little

while ago, but if you like the science,

498

:

he's on my podcast, he told his

story more than the science actually.

499

:

But in general, he tends

to talk about the science.

500

:

So his book Alcohol Explained, you

would probably love to listen to very

501

:

scientific and quite, blunt about

this is actually what's happening.

502

:

It really makes you

think and rewire a bit.

503

:

So that might be a nice one

for you to listen to if you

504

:

haven't, and thank you so much.

505

:

I've loved talking to you and hearing

your story and I love your accent.

506

:

It's nice to have a different

voice on my podcast as well.

507

:

so thank you for taking the time and

working with me on the time difference.

508

:

I really appreciate it.

509

:

And I'm really looking

forward to this one going out.

510

:

I'll let you know as soon as that

happens so that you can share it

511

:

with all of your, your sober sisters

and anyone else who wants to listen.

512

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115:

Yes, oh, well, I love your

513

:

accent and it's an honor.

514

:

I love that it's actually snowing here.

515

:

So,

516

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115: Is it snowing?

517

:

Oh gosh.

518

:

Well, enjoy that hot chocolate all round.

519

:

squadcaster-g3j8_1_11-21-2024_113115: yep.

520

:

Thank

521

:

vic-_1_11-21-2024_163115:

right, and thank you so much.

522

:

Bye.

523

:

Thank you for listening.

524

:

To Sabre alcohol-free stories.

525

:

If this episode helped you, please.

526

:

Please like share and follow.

527

:

Or leave a review on pod chaser.

528

:

Dot com.

529

:

And if you've got a story to

tell, please contact me on Sabre.

530

:

A F stories@outlook.com.

531

:

And don't forget.

532

:

You can make your catch phrase.

533

:

I don't drink.

Next Episode All Episodes Previous Episode

Listen for free

Show artwork for Sober, Alcohol Free Stories

About the Podcast

Sober, Alcohol Free Stories
"I Don't Drink"
If you’ve ever googled “do I drink too much” this podcast is for you!

This is for those of you who end up wondering what’s wrong with you, questioning how your friends can possibly drink so slowly, or worse can just have one with dinner (aliens). For those of you who have tried to moderate, just a Thursday, only red wine, not before 6, not after 9, not if I’m wearing blue 😊

For those of you who secretly don’t enjoy the theatre because you know the show will be an interruption to a booze filled evening. For those who fall out with loved ones, lose handbags, feel lonely or shameful the morning after, wear sunglasses on the school run, or enjoy way too many mints for an average human. For those who need something to change but feel it it’s impossible to break up with their loyal companion – booze.

The good news is you are NOT weird, or alone, there’s millions of us, just like you. You CAN stop drinking alcohol. I know this because until Jan 2022 I was all the above, and now “I don’t drink”.

In this podcast we will delve in to what it takes to become alcohol free in a society that’s quite frankly obsessed with drinking! I’ll talk to people just like you and me, some near the beginning of their alcohol-free life, and some further along, but all with one thing in common, the courage to stare booze in the face and say NO, NOT ME, NOT ANYMORE! They will share their sliding doors moments, regrets, loves, pink clouds and the tools that have helped them to succeed.

We will show you that life without the “wine witch” is actually pretty amazing, how we all thought we were losing something, but what we have gained is insurmountable. We will share how our lives transformed, skin began to glow, sleep became deep and relaxing, bodies became healthy, relationships flourished, careers progressed, and our minds were at peace. WE will show you that you deserve the chance to be happy and free and turn what may seem impossible into possible.

Listen along and join me in making your catchphrase “I don’t drink”.

About your host

Profile picture for VICTORIA Banat

VICTORIA Banat